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Week 2 blogs

35 thoughts on “Week 2”

  1. JamesBowden

    When I was in class my teacher was teaching me how to make a maze on scratch. As soon I got on to scratch I had to go to a Pokémon tournament. There was 10 people in this tournament in the library. My first opponent was pink giraffe it was a ten on ten cards. I chose ten mega ex’s and pink giraffe chose one mega and all the rest regular Pokémon cards. And just before we started the battle Mr Eldridge said “drilling through the hall” and he drilled in to the library it was nuts. After he said get back to game children “quietly”
    Like he was really quiet.

    1. Mr Eldridge

      I like how you’ve taken an activity in school James. You’ve got all 5 words in.

      Could you rephrase this sentence please?
      ‘My first opponent was pink giraffe it was a ten on ten cards.’

  2. CocoDe Maid

    Their once lived a giraffe called Bambi,and he was very confident until one day,it was his first day at school and he was really excited about it.But when he got their everyone was laughing at him except on giraffe so he walked over to the giraffe and asked what everyone was laughing at,he said that they were laughing at his long neck.so from then on he was really quiet and shy,then the giraffe said don’t worry we can buy you a scarf.So the next day Bambi and the giraffe went and bought Bambi a pink scarf and Bambi really liked it.So the he went to school with his friend and showed the teacher and the teacher said”WOW Bambi I like your scarf”
    and all the children said”sorry to Bambi for laughing at him”.
    and in the end they were all drilling happy.

    1. Mr Eldridge

      I like how your story unfolds 🙂 You’ve got all 5 words in, however not sure about drilling.

      Read back over your work, can you spot some spelling mistakes?

  3. ElenWhite

    The great school trip

    Today I went on an exciting school trip with my friends. On the trip we saw all sorts of animals; big, small, tall and short animals. Sometimes we could be loud but sometimes we had to be quiet.
    My favourite animals were the giraffes, and my favourite giraffe was a magical, pink giraffe. We all sat on the floor quietly but suddenly I heard some loud drilling. I couldn’t believe my eyes, my favourite giraffe was drilling the wall with his laser eyes, to escape with us. Our teacher wasn’t happy when he found the giraffe on the bus.

  4. JamesSmith

    The Parrot’s Day Out
    I’m sitting quietly in my classroom. It’s an English lesson, my favourite! The teacher told us to write a story but I can’t think what to write about. It’s really hot and stuffy in here, I wish the man drilling the road outside would stop, it’s breaking my train of thought. Not even my lucky pink pen is helping me today! Think, think, what can I write about? I know, I’ll write about a giraffe taking his pet parrot to the moon in a specially made rocket ship.

    1. Mr Eldridge

      Well done James, i like it 🙂 A funny ending. You’ve varied your sentences well and punctuation. Let’s hope this level of writing continues in class.

  5. EunLee

    The Pink Giraffe

    A long time ago there lived a young giraffe called Pink because she was pink. She was pink because she was born like that. Her mother and father were surprised when they saw that she was pink. They did not know why it happened. Years past and Pink had now gone to school but the teacher was very surprised that she was pink (!). That night the teacher visited her parents when Pink was sleeping. The teacher spoke very quietly and had a conversation with them. During the week Pink loved drilling. It was fun for her. One day she accidently made a big hole as big as an elephant’s ear. She had great idea after she got told off. Her idea was to put an elephant’s ear there because an elephant could not go in the classroom. So they put an elephant ear so he could hear the teacher.

    1. Mr Eldridge

      Well done Joy, a well written 100wc. You’ve included all 5 words 🙂 I like the ending showing how Pink helped the other elephant.

      Think about how you can vary punctuation, the use of commas in your sentences.

  6. GraceLambert

    Bang! “You need to be drilling that pipe quietly” said one of the workers to the other. They were working in the giraffe enclosure at the zoo.

    A school class was watching the giraffes. “I love giraffes” said the teacher. All of a sudden, a giraffe whipped the teacher’s pink hat off her head and put it on its own head. “Security, can you get my hat back please?” requested the teacher.

    “We’ve had a long day children, it’s time to go” screeched the teacher. She was so worried about her hat falling off, she didn’t notice the giraffe poo and she trod in it. When she got back on the bus, there was an awful smell. The driver asked her to sit at the back of the bus and she did and all of the children tried to sit at the front.

    They arrived back at school and the Head Teacher said “What did you learn today?” and the teacher replied “That I hate giraffes….”

    The end.

    5. Mr Eldridge

      🙂 I love the ending, very funny! A well written 100wc. Could you show this quality of writing in class Grace? Well punctuated and paragraphed.

  7. MaxSmart

    There once lived a crazy pink giraffe that belongs to my teacher. Down the road from her home a couple of construction builders started drilling a hole. My teacher doesn’t know why they were drilling but her giraffe sure does not like it. She has asked the workers could they drill somewhere else but they said “no no no”! So she asked would they at least do it quietly and quickly. So they said they will do it as fast as they can. One week later they left because they couldn’t afford to drill any more so Mrs Diles and Elma the giraffe lived a life in peace.

    1. Mr Eldridge

      Well done Max, you’ve used all 5 words for this weeks 100wc. You’ve varied your punctuation, but could you use commas within your sentences. Read your work out loud, where could they go in this piece of writing(think about where you take a breath, they will go there)?

  8. SerenNetherway

    Deep in the hot Savanah there was a giraffe that was a funny colour. It was pink! During a news report about this pink giraffe, a teacher was watching this report and found it particularly interesting. The funny pink giraffe was eating leaves quietly under the blazing sun.
    “I must go and see this pink giraffe for myself in the beautiful sunset and take photos for the children to see,” exclaimed the teacher. So off the teacher went to see the giraffe as soon as the next school holiday started.
    When the teacher got to Africa she was walking towards the pink giraffe unfortunately she fell down a ditch. To get out she was drilling holes with sticks to handles to pull herself out of danger. Finally she took a photo of the pink giraffe eating the leaves in the sunset.

    1. Mr Eldridge

      Well done Seren, a good 100wc using all 5 words. You’ve paragraphed your work and used good vocabulary – particularly, exclaimed and unfortunately.

      Don’t forget to read over your work. Could you rewrite part of this sentence so that it makes sense please?
      To get out she was drilling holes with sticks to handles to pull herself out of danger.

  9. LouieIons

    Once , on a extreme school trip to the zoo there was a teacher with a class . When they had got to the zoo the teacher said to the class it was time to get of the bus and the teacher said to go to the toilet . After we had gone to the toilet to we were of to their first stop and that was the giraffe palace and it was nap time so they had to talk quietly but there were work men drilling in the fence . In a couple of minutes time the giraffe woke up and wasn’t happy he went straight to the pink haired teacher and bit his head off ,he was running around like a headless chicken. After that the giraffe said to him self the children must go ,and that was what he did. Thank you for spending your time with so that I could tell you this sad but funny story

    1. Mr Eldridge

      You’ve managed to use all 5 words. Could you think about varying your punctuation? In the second sentence could you use speech marks?

  10. DannySaunders

    One sunny day the children at Bryn Deri School went on a trip to the zoo, they travelled there in pink Lamborghinis. When they got there they went off to do whatever they wanted to do. They saw zebras, elephants, goats and pigs rolling in dirty mud. They saw massive giraffes, some of them were taller than the trees! But when their teacher called them back quietly none of them heard her. So everybody kept looking around but in the end the teacher had to rounded them all up it took a while. But everybody got back on the pink Lamborghinis. On the way back they this really loud drilling noise and it was annoying every one.

    1. Mr Eldridge

      Well done Danny, a good start to your 100 wc. well punctuated and well written sentences. Take a look at this section, can you spot and correct your mistakes please:

      So everybody kept looking around but in the end the teacher had to rounded them all up it took a while. But everybody got back on the pink Lamborghinis. On the way back they this really loud drilling noise and it was annoying every one.

  11. JamesIstance

    Once there was a teacher sipping a cup of coffee in the staff room. She looked in the mirror and saw she was pink.
    “How am I pink?” she exclaimed to herself. She looked out of the window and saw a giraffe drilling a hole in the road.
    “All I see is craziness these days, I must be losing my mind, or I had too much coffee! ” She asked the teacher in the next room quietly”Am I pink and is there a giraffe drilling a hole in the road outside?” He answered” No, what makes you think that?” She fainted.

  12. MaisyWithers

    Draft or giraffe?
    Mr pink the supply teacher was shouting at year 5 to do their work more quietly, but they couldn’t hear him because there was a loud drilling noise coming from the new nursery. The pupils stared throwing paper aeroplanes, pencils and the lot about when all of a sudden Mr pink shouted,
    “Ahh! There’s a giraffe in the room!”
    A child in the room called Maisy said cheekily,” Yes,I thought I felt a bit cold!”
    ” No, no, no, a ‘giraffe’ not a ‘draft ‘!”
    “Well, you can never be too sure with those windows!”
    And with that the children started throwing their paper aeroplanes and pencils about again with the giraffe joining in and the supply teacher making his way to the staff room to have a lie down…

    1. Mr Eldridge

      🙂 A crazy classroom. I’m glad that doesn’t happen in our class 😉

      Well written using different punctuation and paragraphs. What should Mr pink have at the start of his name?

  13. DylanCobley

    Long ago there was a giraffe called Bobby and everyday Bobby would try to balance on a ball because he wanted to be in the circus. One day Bobby was by a school when he heard some drilling, but when he heard the drilling he lost his balance and fell of his ball into a school classroom. Inside the classroom all the children were sitting down and just staring at Bobby with their mouths wide open and even the teacher, Mrs Crazy had her mouth wide open. When Bobby picked himself off the ground he went to go and see what had made him lose his balance. As soon as Bobby got to the school yard he saw the headmaster digging out a massive pink crystal out of the ground. Back in the classroom the children quietly snuck outside to where Bobby was and told Bobby that the crystal was for a giraffe who is going to be the new circus teacher, and that is how Bobby the giraffe got to become a circus teacher in a school that he smashed.

  14. JacobMcCallum

    One day at the zoo the giraffe and pink flamingo were planning to escape back into the wild. They had to sneak past the zookeeper very quietly, luckily he was teaching a group of children all about the animal’s so he didn’t notice them. When they got out of the zoo they saw a very busy main road, there were lot’s of workmen drilling and fixing all the potholes . The giraffe and the pink flamingo continued their way. After days of walking they eventually made it back into the wild, they were so happy to see their family and friends. They are now free forever!

  15. QasimRahman

    “Today we went to a school trip and we went by bus of course but not just a bus but it was THE best pink bus ever. On are way there I heard a really loud drilling sound but the sound got tranquil because we were going away from it. I forgot to tell you that we were going to the ZOOOOOOO!!!!!!! when we got there we all saw a massive giraffet A.K.A. giraffe as you all now. Also the giraffe quietly made the usual noise that i simply don’t now what the sound is. DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!!!!!!!
    The teacher SHOUTED at certain people that didn’t behave properly.

  1. PhoebeDavies

    Homework week 3
    Once there was a giraffe a very special giraffe because he was pink. The pink giraffe was the happiest giraffe I know, but one day he heard a strange noise. The strange noise was really quiet and only the pink giraffe could hear it. Everyday the noise got louder and louder so the pink giraffe had enough and went to find out what the noise was so he set off to find it. When he arrived he was shocked to see a construction site with big machines drilling holes into the ground making buildings instead beautiful trees and grass. The pink giraffe needed help quickly, but who could help the pink giraffe ??

    1. Mr Eldridge

      Well done Phoebe, I like how your ending finishes, with a question, it makes the reader think.

      Can you read this sentence and correct it please:
      When he arrived he was shocked to see a construction site with big machines drilling holes into the ground making buildings instead beautiful trees and grass.

  2. JessicaClegg

    A long time ago some children were going on a school trip, to the zoo in fact it was the oddest zoo in the world. We were travelling to the zoo in the minibus with our teacher, as we started to get nearer we heard a man drilling in the road so we stopped the minibus, my teacher got out and asked them to be quiet. Then we got out and we went into the zoo, by the entrance we got some popcorn to feed the pink giraffes as we carried on we past the blue monkeys and the orange and yellow zebras. As the day draws to an end we head back on the bus and go home and now I wish I can see pink giraffes again.

    1. Mr Eldridge

      Well done Jess, you’ve included all 5 words in the prompt.

      Can this sentence be punctuated again please? Could you open the sentence differently?:
      Then we got out and we went into the zoo, by the entrance we got some popcorn to feed the pink giraffes as we carried on we past the blue monkeys and the orange and yellow zebras.

 

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